August

Today was a pretty good day for a Monday.  The workday went by rather quickly.  Not really happy with my job, but at least I'm working. 

I have so much that I want to accomplish this month.  There are things I want to change and improve.

I'm going to try to start blogging more.  This will be an outlet for me when stressed or frustrated.  I also need to workout more.  I need to lose fifteen pounds.  There are many other things I need to accomplish...I will share these things with you as they occur.

???

It seems the harder I try, the more I struggle.  I get frustrated at times because I try my best to do right and it bites me in the butt.  Why is it that those who do whatever they want and live immoral lives prosper.  I know that my reward is in heaven, but it would sure be nice to have a little here on earth.  Trying to stay positive and try to remember...Gal  6:9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

Natural

I did my BC (big chop) today. I am so happy. After 14 months of transitioning I am all natural!

Rough Start

Last week was a rough week. First week back at work and the longest week ever. I worked beside a lady who worked my nerves all week...Friday couldn't get here fast enough. When I thought my week coudn't get worse it did. I came home and my mother told me that my grandmother had a stroke a little before seven that morning. I spent the weekend going up there to visit her. I am praying she gets better soon...I love my granny and I don't like seeing her like this. Meanwhile, the feeling of emptiness has hit me again. I was watching the real housewives of atlanta and saw a girl from my hometown up there...it made me realize how little I have done with my life. I haven't been anywhere or done anything. I am also dealing with the loneliness issue again. I hope things get better and it does so quickly...

2011

It's a new year! I am grateful to have made it to see the new year considering all that I have faced in 2010.  Although I am thankful and grateful, I am also a little depressed.  I feel empty.  Part of the reason for this emptiness is the fact that I have brought in another new year alone.  It has been almost five years since my last serious relationship.  It seems that everyone has someone except me.  My brother is happily married and my sister will be getting married next month.  They are both younger than me.  I am heading towards my mid thirties and it seems as if I'll never meet that special someone and get married.  It makes me sad and scared all at the same time.  I am lonely.  I spend most of my time with my parents because I do not have any friends.  I am afraid I will be one of those little old women in the restaurant eating by themselves. 

I am starting this blog to express my feelings because I don't have anyone I can talk to.  Whenever I tell my parents I am lonely, they say all I need is Jesus.  Being a single Christian is not easy.  Most people will tell you that all you need is Jesus and that you should learn to be content in your situation.  This may be true in most cases, but sometimes you need someone tangible to talk to.  I have asked the Lord to help me with my loneliness and emptiness.  I am hoping He steps in soon and fix these feelings.

I hope that this is no implication of what this year will be like.  I have been looking forward to the new year.  I am hopeful about the many blessings that are in store for me this year.  I am looking for better health, more wealth, and companionship.  What's to come has to be better than what's been.

Well....until next time.....